Graduation and Life

The day finally came when Scott and I graduated. Sweet! It seemed almost anti-climatic though for me. When you first start college, graduation seems so far away that your head sort of goes into this stick-to-the-grindstone mindset. So when graduation finally came, I was kind of like, well here we go. Let's move on now. We have been so blessed to get to this point. It was a really special moment to be able to walk together during graduation while holding hands. It was somewhat symbolic of our passing through all walks of life together.

Although I am somewhat remiss to bring the topic up, there is also the sadness of our recent miscarriage. This may be a bit private to write about, but it would be hard to explain our lives without mentioning such an integral part of it. Graduation was a strange juxtaposition to this grief, combining joy and tragedy. The experience has brought Scott and I closer; we definitely have a different, special perspective concerning life now. One of my struggles has been the physical aspect of healing. My hormones are a little out-of-whack, and it's been interesting waiting for my body to get back to normal. For the most part, we have healed and moved on, but there are always the unexpected reminders of our grief. When I e-mailed my supervisor and cooperating teacher for permission to use them as references for my resume, they both asked me how the baby was doing. When I went to church, an old Young Women's leader asked me in a teasing manner why I was behind some other girls in having babies, ignorant of our recent hardship. These are the things that I'm looking forward to dying down. The unintentional pricks to the pain that is still healing.

Whew, I'm sorry about dwelling on that. It is nice though to get it out. Currently, Scott and I are living at my parent's house down in the basement. Scott has his own lovely little corner in the alcove of our room, which used to be my beauty parlor. A fact that I enjoy reminding him about. Mom painted the room lavender with a pretty, butter yellow. the lavender matches the color of the flowers in one of our engagement pictures, which she is going to blow up and put in the room. Scott is working a few writing jobs while accumulating more, and I am in the process of applying for some online, teaching jobs. We are both looking forward to hearing back about the master's degree programs that he has applied for. And that's pretty much what's been going on for us.

Love to all,

Clarissa